Have you ever been to a Kenyan hospital to visit a patient and the moment you ask where your friend or family member is you hear something like
Then you ask ‘‘Wapi?’’
They respond ‘‘Huyo alikufa Jana’’
Then you sit there trying to digest the facts you have been told because you are motionless.
Even if you begin to cry no one will attend to you because no one cares.
One may say they are used to it. To then it’s normal. But I will ask
Why has it become normal ?
This is because no one dares to find how doctors feel when their patient dies. If at any one point they diagnose cancer and it turns out positive or a patient dies in his/her hands he/she may get into a confused state, begin to blame himself and finally enter into depressive states.
This doctor needs care, he needs to meet with someone who will take time to listen and help in adjusting negative thoughts. This should be done twice weekly or even every day. This process is known as debriefing.
Debriefing is disclosing to a subject the purpose of the experiment. It is a process of giving and receiving confidential information after a task experiment, work or discussion. Debriefing should not only be done for psychologists but for anyone in the work industry.
Lawyers go to court handle cases some are lost, some are won. They go through lots of processes to prepare for a case and frustration in the courts. They handle clients with madness and defend guilty parties knowingly or unknowingly. After going through all this stress you need to talk to someone who will help you get over a lost case and trauma that is related to the walls of the court rooms. They need debriefing. They need to tell someone about the dramatic/ interesting/chaotic court session.
Teachers receive a lot of stress from their work being channeled from their students and parents of their students. These amounts to a lot of pressure and if they pour it out to someone who is trustworthy and is willing to listen they will have stable lives.
Late July there was a policeman who undressed wore sack cloth then slept outside the Langata police station. We check whether they have 32 teeth or flat feet. We check if their height is standard but not their mental heights.
All these stress is transmitted to the people around us. Therefore our mental states being dysfunctional our families also become dysfunctional because we do not know what is inside us is disturbing us. We need to repair ourselves first. Because who we are affects how we relate to other people.